video • un: el rey

[shabby]

[ The video opens on a man's face, a little too close up for a few seconds. Then he pulls the arm with the communicator back, lengthening the shot and showing vegetation behind him. He's in the atrium, currently sitting on a low hanging tree branch. ]

Hello, alien-abducted internet peoples.

[ He says it cheerfully, with a smile and a wave. For a man who comes from a world without shit like this, he's unperturbed. Possibly because he thinks it's a drug-induced hallucination. ]

How are you today? [ He gestures off to the side. ] This is crazy, no? Outer space and shit. It's like a movie.

[ The image shakes a little as he starts digging through his pants pocket. Eventually, he pulls out a joint and, remembering that he's in the middle of talking to people, asks; ]

Hey, does anybody have a lighter?

Comments

[shabby]

[ Vaas has been content to let Jason make friends, but now that he's going and upsetting people, he figures he has to step in. ]

S'okay.

[ Everything about him is relaxed and casual, like this is no big deal. ]

See, I killed his brother, he killed like half of my guys. But then he killed my sister, so we're square.

[ He smiles. ]

Jason's okay. You should be friends. Help me teach him to be a man instead of a little pussy.

[yokunaru]

[Why is there so much killing??? Yuuri's known of the phrase "there are two sides to every story" but never has it applied more in his opinion.

Surprising even himself, Yuuri decides to just hear them both out instead of immediately slipping away as he might have done before. New life on the ship, new goals and rules. It would have been a shame for him to go lose his new determination after just a few days.]

How exactly did all of this even start?

[You don't just kill people for no reason...right?]

I am so sorry

[dudebro]

[ No, you know what? He's going to butt in again and tell the real side of what went on. He's switching to video for this. ]

Okay, you want to know what happened? I was on vacation with my brothers and my friends. A guy we met convinced us to go skydiving, so we did 'cause who's going to turn that down??

Anyways, we go skydiving and the fucker leaves us there because it was a fuckin' set up from the start! They capture and sell people on these islands, right? Him—Vaas—and this other fucker, Hoyt, spread my friends and family out. I wound up with my older brother and we tried to break out of camp. And this asshole here shoots my brother in the neck. For trying to get away.

Nearly kills me more than one time and the rest of my friends and my little brother!

I was trying to stay alive and shit. And for the record, I didn't kill his sister. She jumped in front of me and took a knife to the gut. That wasn't my fault.

[shabby]

Hey!

[ Most of it's fair. He did all that shit. But that one bit is a big fat fucking lie. ]

Don't you dare act like me and Hoyt were friends. I hated that fucker more than you for the shit he did to me.

[ Asshole. ]

I'm trying to give you some fucking credit for what happened with Citra. Fucking take it. [ A lot disgruntled mutter follows. ] Least you could do after fucking her like a dog in heat.

[dudebro]

[ He's not talking to Vaas. Not yet. Eat shit, fucker. ]

fuck off
i dont fuckinh want credit
lest of all from u

[yokunaru]

[It's too late to regret his life choices, huh...but seriously, what did he even walk into?]

Um...I hate to break in. [And really, he does sound very apologetic about interrupting their argument.] But is this really something you want to talk about in public?

[shabby]

[ That question gets a blank stare. ]

Why shouldn't we?

[yokunaru]

Because it sounds like something you should be talking about in private?

[At this point he's starting to sound a little resigned.]

You really don't care if everyone knows?

[shabby]

[ Vaas shrugs. ]

You know what bothers me? Bad dental hygiene. Do you floss?

[yokunaru]

Um... y-yes, I do. [He stammers his answer before he can think better of it.

He pauses.] Wait. What does that have to do with anything?

[shabby]

[ The joy of trying to have a conversation with Vaas: it never moves in a straight, reasonable progression. ]

My friend, Christopher, he didn't like to floss. He had very poor dental hygiene. I think that's partly why he died. Tooth decay.

[ Spoiler: that wasn't the problem. Vaas was the problem. But Vaas isn't entirely aware of that. ]

You're a good guy. I like you.

[ Run away, Yuuri. Run away. ]

[yokunaru]

[Yuuri seems to have realized that as well, not even bothering to try and steer the conversation back to its original topic.]

You decided you like me because I floss?

[He's, admittedly, sort of amused in that 'this is so surreal and I have no idea what to do about it' way.]

[shabby]

Sure. Why not? A guy that understands the importance of flossing can't be too bad.

[ There's a pause as he frowns at the communicator. ]

Can he?

[yokunaru]

[SURE...why not. He's just going to go along with this, because really, what else can he do at this point?]

I...I guess not.

[Clearing this throat.]

Um, if you still wanted that lighter, I'll check the shopping center for you.

[shabby]

What? [ What lighter? Then he remembers. Oh right. ] Yeah. See, I knew you were a good guy.

[ A beat. ]

You want a mango for your trouble?

[yokunaru]

[Remembering just how Vaas had reacted the first time--]

...sure. If you really want to give me one. Just tell me what room you've been assigned to so I know where to drop the lighter off.

[shabby]

Just bring it to this park. I'll be here. It's nice. Even if the sky isn't right.

[ It reminds him of home. ]

I'm Vaas. Who're you?

[dudebro]

does it rly matter dude?
a shithead is always gonna b a shithead even in private

[yokunaru]

I...I guess that's true.

[There's an uncomfortable sort of silence now, though Yuuri manages to find something else to say before it drags on for too long.]

Was the rest of your family okay? And your friends. [This, at least, he sounds genuinely concerned about.]

[dudebro]

as okay as they're gonna be for now, i guess??
i was helping them on a boat to escape when i was suddenly here so idk man idfk

[yokunaru]

[That's...pretty unfortunate timing.

Quietly-] I hope that they made it to safety, then.

[dudebro]

[ Yeah no kidding ): ]

me to dude. me to.

[yokunaru]

[He isn't sure what other comfort he can offer him.]

Um..I'm Yuuri Katsuki. It sounds like you just got here, too, so...if you need some help finding your way around, you can look for me.

[dudebro]

[ To be fair, Jason wouldn't really know how to accept comfort. It's not really something that happens. ]

cool
i'll keep it mind
jason, btw
c u around

[ Wait... There's a pun here with the name thing. Sorry. ]

lol yu
c yu around
fuck i luv it.

[yokunaru]

[That draws a shake of the head from him, though Jason doesn't see it.]

See you