video • un: el rey

[shabby]

[ The video opens on a man's face, a little too close up for a few seconds. Then he pulls the arm with the communicator back, lengthening the shot and showing vegetation behind him. He's in the atrium, currently sitting on a low hanging tree branch. ]

Hello, alien-abducted internet peoples.

[ He says it cheerfully, with a smile and a wave. For a man who comes from a world without shit like this, he's unperturbed. Possibly because he thinks it's a drug-induced hallucination. ]

How are you today? [ He gestures off to the side. ] This is crazy, no? Outer space and shit. It's like a movie.

[ The image shakes a little as he starts digging through his pants pocket. Eventually, he pulls out a joint and, remembering that he's in the middle of talking to people, asks; ]

Hey, does anybody have a lighter?

Comments

( un: CHOSEN1 )

[dudebro]

[ Okay no. No, no, no, no. Just no. Why is this happening? How is this happening??? Vaas is supposed to be dead. Jason remembers this clearly. Because he killed him. Stabbed him s e v e r a l times.

So much for having a nice time in fuckin outerspace. He's so not giving Vaas the satisfaction of video or voice. ]

wtf r u doing here???¿??

[shabby]

[ Vaas squints at this deplorably incomprehensible mangling of the English language. The disapproval is all over his face. ]

You trying to write English, E.T.? You need some fucking vowels.

[ Just wait for the moment he realizes who this is coming from. Just wait. ]

[dudebro]

[ Fuck he's so pissed off right now. DON'T GIVE HIM THAT LOOK. ]

oh piss off.
i don't need 2 listen 2 ur shit here.

[shabby]

There! See! [ He points triumphantly to the screen. ] Vowels, motherfucker. English's full of them.

[ A beat as his expression grows sympathetic. ]

You're new to it, huh? S'okay. We all gotta start somewhere. Your is spelled why-oh-you-are by the way. You're welcome.

[dudebro]

[ He has half a mind to go down to the atrium right now and light Vaas on fire and stab him a few more times for good measure with his stabby knife. Stabby shabby eyyy. ]

fuk u.
i kno how 2 fuckin spell.
jesus christ how r u still alive?????////

[shabby]

[ He immediately starts shaking his head. ]

No, you don't. There's only like seven fucking words spelled right in there.

[ He could go on, but then he reads the end again during a recount and pauses, frowning. ]

Why wouldn't I be alive?

1/??

[dudebro]

bcuz

[dudebro]

no u kno wat

[dudebro]

BECAUSE

[dudebro]

I

[dudebro]

KILLED

[dudebro]

YOU

d. ( sorry )

[dudebro]

i FUCKING KILLED so u shuld do the rite FUCKIN THING AND STAY THE FUCK DEAD

[shabby]

[ Vaas's expression grows more perplexed as he reads and for a few seconds after the messages stop coming he just sits there reading over them. Because really, what the fuck is this stupid alien talking about? Nobody killed him. The only person who tried was Jason. And Jason...

Jason.

Slowly, like sunlight pouring down a mountain at sunrise, his expression changes from confusion to glee. It would seem impossible under ordinary circumstances, but aliens capable of building a ship that could get them to Earth surely would know how to spell simple English words. Jason, on the other hand... ]

Jason!

[ Suddenly Vaas' day is a million times better. ]

Jason, you're here! Look, Jason. [ He roots around in his pocket and pulls out Jason's phone and his wallet. ] I have your shit. You should come here and get it, hermano.

[dudebro]

[ He's made a huge mistake. Clearly. A huge fucking mistake. Not that it's the first one he's ever made, but still.

Damn it he's so mad. ]

y the fuck do u still have my shit????,//

[shabby]

[ Vaas frowns. ]

Don't you want it? Your phone doesn't work to call people but it's got all of your pictures and videos on it.

[dudebro]

[ He's wondering if he'll get in some kind of trouble if he kills Vaas again... ]

yea i want it
its mine!!

[shabby]

Then don't be such a bitch. Jesus Christ. I fucking saved it for you. Thought those pictures of your stupid fucking friends might be important to you.

[ He clicks his tongue in disapproval. ]

You are shit at gratitude, Jason.

[dudebro]

[ He almost responds. Almost. But in the end, he decides against it and just throws the thing across his little room.

After three very long, very deliberating seconds, Jason decides he's just going to actually face this particular demon. Right there in the flesh.

So, he just slams out of his bunk and goes to the atrium until he can figure out where the fuck Vaas is. And when he spots him, he doesn't even slow down but speeds up and takes a flying leap, fully intent to tackle him down to the ground. ]

[shabby]

[ He's eyeing his communicator, waiting for more messages from Jason, when he sees movement from the corner of his eye. Recognizing it instantly, he jumps down from the branch, conversations forgotten. ]

Jason!

[ Instead of stepping to the side out of the way, Vaas spreads his arms wide, like a long absent friend eager to share an embrace. Jason plows into him and he goes with the momentum, tipping over backward as he wraps his arms tight around Jason's sides and hauling him down with him.

The impact against the ground knocks the air from Vaas' lungs but he doesn't fight it, just hangs onto Jason and tangles their legs together so he can't kick him. He tries to roll them over, aiming to pin Jason to the ground where he can't hurt himself. But whether he's successful or not, the response is the same: a wildly sharp smile and smug satisfaction. ]

I'm happy to see you too, Jason.

[dudebro]

[ Oh he hates Vaas. He hates him so much. Anger surges within him to the point of bursting and he lets out a gutteral yell as they fall to the ground. It's a struggle to fight Vaas in close quarters without a gun or other weapon. He may be shorter than Jason but he has a way better handle on all that control bullshit and centering himself. Jason never needed to know how to fight anyone before arriving at Rook. As cool as everything was to learn, he's still kinda pissed he had to learn it all this way.

Even more so when he winds up pinned beneath Vaas in a tangled fucking mess. He has an arm free, though, and attempts to wildly swing to land a hit somewhere, anywhere or try to push him the hell off. ]

Get the hell off me!!

[shabby]

[ One never knows the power contained within these ragged Rook Island tank tops!

Vaas takes the blow from that flailing arm with aplomb, barely flinching from it even though it'll probably leave a bruise on his face tomorrow. It isn't the worst he's ever been hit and there's so much adrenaline coursing through him that it wouldn't matter even if it was. ]

Jason. [ It's a low, half-exasperated admonishment as Vaas catches that hand by the wrist and presses it down to the ground. He leans forward then, putting more of his strength into keeping Jason down where he can't hurt anyone. ] Stop being a bitch, Jason. Can you do that?

[ Granted, he already knows the answer to this, but he lifts his eyebrows in a kind of hopefulness anyway. ]

I'll let you up if you settle down.

[dudebro]

[ Yeah, tanktops really hide one's musculature..................

Jason feels somewhat vindicated that he got at least one hit in. That's one tiny, little, small victory. And that's enough. For now, at least. He fully plans on getting both hands around Vaas' throat sooner rather than later. Still, it burns ( a lot ) that Vaas manages to catch his arm and pin it down. God-fucking-damn it. In retaliation ( citation needed ), Jason bucks up his hips in a bid to throw Vaas off. It's not going to work, and he knows it's not. Doesn't mean he's not going to try. He's not going to just lay here like some pussy bitch.

No matter what Vaas thinks. ]

Fuck you.

[ First. Thing's. First. Gotta get that out. He's half contemplating just spitting in Vaas' face, but he doesn't. ( Not yet, anyway. ) He's getting a little red in the face from the fury that still burns within him, to say nothing of the childish struggling he's been doing to get away. ]

I swear to God, Vaas. Get the fuck off me.

[shabby]

[ Jason's display of defiance might be more successful and pointed if he was doing more than writhing and bucking around under Vaas like one of Badtown's hookers. As it is, Vaas is left to watch him with baffled curiosity, head cocked to one side and his scarred eyebrow quirked upward.

Once Jason stops whining, Vaas stares at him in silence for a moment. The curiosity fades, replaced by a serious thoughtfulness that isn't often seen on his face. ]

Jason. [ He doesn't let him go or sit back, but he doesn't invade Jason's space any further either. ] If you are trying to seduce me, you are giving me very mixed signals. That's very rude. You need to make up your mind.

[dudebro]

[ When Vaas goes still like that, Jason can't help but do the same. Honestly, he's not really sure what's coming or if he even wants to hear it, but it's really not ofter that Vaas gets quiet or thoughtful. Jason doesn't know why he's bothering to pause and possibly hear him out, but he does. There's little else he can do in this position, anyway.

Of course, he immediately regrets everything and if it's possible, he gets even angrier. Like to the point of physically psychotic sort of angry. Jason pulls the strength from whatever mystical bullshit Citra was talking about and leverages himself better and in an instant he flips their positions. He might not be able to hold Vaas down long, but he doesn't matter. Just this little bit is enough. That there are people stopping and watching them or walking by giving them a huge berth doesn't even matter, either. Only this matters right now, nothing else. He leans down with one hand fisted in that stupid red tanktop and the other bracing his weight. How close he is isn't helping the insult abate any, but Jason doesn't care. His voice is low, dangerous and definitely not something anyone is used to hearing coming from him. ]

You should've just stayed dead, Vaas.

[ There's a heat that sparks in his eyes like flint, showing his anger, showing his ties to something bigger than even he can imagine. Something that Vaas knows a hell of a lot better. Jason didn't ask for this shit, but it's what he's got and he's trying to adjust to everything.

He pushes against Vaas in order to get up, wishing he could just punch his fist right through Vaas' chest to rip out his heart, to hold that in his hand and crush it himself just so he knows he'll be dead then. Or maybe he wouldn't even then. It's fucking terrifying to think about. He stands there, still burning with rage but somehow sullen. ]

Give me my shit back.