video • un: el rey

[shabby]

Hello, internet peoples!

[ Getting right to the point, Vaas pans the camera around to show the Red Lion of Voltron sitting in the hangar, now sporting a fresh coat of thick black tiger stripes. ]

Anyone want to help me get this tiger I found into the atrium? I will give you some steaks for your trouble.

[ Fair warning: these steaks are made from the Fek Vaas and Reaper killed during their hunting expedition. Also they're going to have to dismantle the Red Lion. It's not going to fit through the doorways. ]

Comments

1/?

[mullet]

[ What is happening? Why is this happening?? Is this happening???? ]

[mullet]

[ He has to watch this a few times before he can admit to himself that, yes, this is really actually happening. ]

WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?

[mullet]

It's not a tiger, it's a lion—what the—

[mullet]

Why did you paint it?! What is the matter with you!!!

[mullet]

You can't just do something like that! It's not even yours!

[ He's so angry right now. It's sort of embarrassing because he's nearly shrieking with rage. ]

d.

[mullet]

[ He's actually running down to the hangar now to defend Red's honor. ]

Leave Red alone! You're not taking it anywhere!!

[shabby]

[ A normal person might be fazed by this. Possibly even a slight bit remorseful for defacing someone else's property. But this is Vaas. He weathers the tirade with bland indifference, then clicks his tongue in reproach. ]

Rights of salvage, hermano. No one claimed it. I found it. This tiger is mine now. [ He smiles beatifically. ] Don't be jealous. I'm sure we can find a tiger for you too.

[ It's a cool tiger. He understands the jealousy. Really he does. ]

[mullet]

You didn't just find it!!

[ Is this guy an idiot? Like, a for real one? Because that is what Keith is thinking right now. ]

It has already been claimed! By me! [ Though, really, Red is the one who claims Keith. So, when power comes back to it, Vaas is the one going to be in trouble. ] And it's a lion! You can't just put stripes on something and call it a different animal completely!

[ He's too young to have a heart attack, right? ]

Are you an idiot or something?!

[shabby]

[ The youth of today. So fiery and passionate, yet so incapable of reasoning things through. It's such a shame. ]

Of course I did. I walked in here and saw it. It was by itself. There was no one around. No one's name is on it.

[ He shrugs. ]

I claimed it. That is how it works.

[mullet]

[ VAAS IS THE ONE NOT CAPABLE OF REASONING THINGS THROUGH!! ]

THAT IS NOT HOW IT WORKS AT ALL!!

[shabby]

Of course it is.

[ Silly boy. It's okay though. Vaas isn't a sore winner. ]

Do you want to help me take it apart? I will give you a few steaks.

[mullet]

[ His head is actually throbbing. Never in Keith's life did he think he'd meet someone worse than Lance. And yet... ]

No! You can't take it apart. That is physically impossible!

[ ...he doesn't actually know if it is or not, but considering all the stuff the lions have been through and they haven't broken apart, he assumes it takes some massive amount of effort to do that. ]

[shabby]

I have tools. It's okay.

[ No one is worse than Vaas. No one. ]

video; un: altea

[juniberries]

[?????/??? Allura's. just...

it's a mix of absolute confusion and anger and disgust over the fact that 1) someone who isn't a paladin is manhandling a Lion and 2) that this very someone has desecrated a Lion of Voltron.]

What the quiznak did you do to the Red Lion? You will not be moving it anywhere.

[shabby]

[ That just makes him laugh. People trying to tell him what to do always does. ]

I'll be doing anything I want to do. Always have. Always will.

[juniberries]

Not with a Lion of Voltron you won't.

There will be no way for you to move it, and you will wash off that horrendous paint!

[Allura's going to try So Hard to order this guy around even though she knows it's not going to work.]

[mullet]

[ Oh my god. ]

No! It is not "okay!" What is the matter with you?? Seriously!

[shabby]

[ On the one hand, it's amusing. On the other, he's killed people for less. The scarred eyebrow arches. ]

Lady, I don't do any fucking thing I don't wanna do. And you touch my tiger—[ He holds a knife up to the camera. ]—I'll cut every one of those fingers off.

[shabby]

Sure it is. Now hermano, shhh. I'm concentrating and all of your shrill little yapping is annoying.

[mullet]

I really don't care if it's annoying you or not. That lion is mine and you can't just do whatever you want here!

VIDEO. — id: paladin

[bayarm]

That's not a tiger, and I wouldn't try moving it if I were you.

[juniberries]

It is not a tiger, it is a Lion of Voltron, and it is not yours.

[she narrows her eyes, and she feels a pulse of adrenaline at that threat.]

You do not frighten me.

[shabby]

Oh, okay. It's yours. [ A beat. ] Where's your name?

[shabby]

[ His smile grows wider and sharper. ]

Spend half an hour with me. You'll change your mind. Everybody does.

[shabby]

Of course it's a tiger. See? [ He points to the stripes. ] It has stripes. That's a tiger, hermano.